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“Shit I left it out?” he said blankly.
“Uh yeah! Now Tay will you answer my question?” Ike asked again.
“Yes! Happy yes we did have sex! God! Why do you care you pervert!” he yelled laughing.
“Shut the hell up! God I am the oldest and I am the only one who hasn’t gotten a piece of action,” he moaned. Tay just snickered, “Where’s Bre? She said she would be here an hour ago.”
“Maybe you really tired her out,” Ike laughed. Tay just through a pillow towards Ike, “At least I HAD sex!”
“That’s beyond the point and Lizzy’s here so I’m outty! We’re just gonna ride around today, I already packed,” he grinned.
“Oh lay off,” Tay moaned. Ike walked into the living room grinning.
“Can you guys give me a ride to Lynn’s please?” Zac asked.
“Sure...where’s Mom and Dad?” Ike asked.
“They took the little ones to a movie.”
“Oh OK. Bye Tay! We’re outta here!” Ike yelled, “Oh and Bre is here!” he yelled waving at me. I waved back and Tay ran up to me and spun me as we hugged.
“Your late,” he whispered.
“Well, you know how I like to make an entrance. Bye guys,” I smiled then directing my attention back to his beautiful eyes. They waved and walked out the door while Tay and I just stood in each others arms.
“Shall we pack?” I asked.
“Yeah,” he sighed jumping back into reality.
“Bye Zac,” Ike smiled pulling away.
Zac waved and then kissed Lynn gently. “Wanna go to Laser Quest?” he asked.
“Sure,” she smiled.
“Tay we can play after you pack,” I said softly.
“Today’s the last day we have together Bre, I don’t think packing should be the first thing on my list.”
“Tay I don’t want you to pack either, knowing that you will be leaving, but you gotta pack.”
“Yeah I know. I just can’t believe tomorrow I’m leaving you. And in the morning of all times. We’ll be back for your birthday though,” he sighed.
“Yeah I know...I just have such a feeling something will go wrong.”
“Nothing will, trust me,” he grabbed me tight in a reassuring hug.
“If only my feelings inside matched with how I feel on the outside,” I began to cry.
“What do you mean?” he asked softly.
“I feel so alone, confused, scared and upset inside...yet outside I don’t.”
“Please don’t,” he begged. He went to kiss me but I pulled away.
“Can we just pack? You really need to pack...you have to leave tomorrow,” I sniffled.
Tay was so confused, he didn’t understand what Bre was feeling. He knew she was hurt but he didn’t know why she was begging him to pack. It was as if something was telling her she wanted him to leave.
“Yeah, I guess,” he said meekly, “Bre is something wrong?” I pulled something out of my pocket.
“Come on I want to buy you a few things. I don’t know what, but you pick what you want and I’ll pay,” Ike grinned.
“Ike this is so unlike you...are you sure?” she asked.
“That’s just it!” he sighed heavily sitting back in his seat, “I never do things a boyfriend should do. I feel so bad.”
“Oh Ikey,” she laughed, “Ikey, your perfect in every way. You don’t need to do this, but if it makes you feel better about yourself then lets go. I want to look around,” she said happily.
“OK...Lizzy?”
“Yeah?”
“I love you,” he said looking into her eyes.
She just smiled and a single tear welled up in her eye. She was so lucky.
“I love you too Ikey.”
“Here I want you to read this.”
“OK,” he said looking confused. It was a letter and Tay began to read it closely.
Dear Breanne, Hey what’s up girl? Your the talk of the school, no wait the town...even better, your the talk of everywhere. No one can believe that you and Lynn are going out with those freaks. And now we all come to realize Elizabeth is dating the other one. Well, I think I should first say, congratulations. You and the other two have broken thousands or hearts and shattered thousands of dreams. OK, I wrote this letter to apologize. I truly didn’t mean to hurt you. I understand I hurt you emotionally and physically and I was wrong to do so. I am sure that is not what you wanted your first day back at FHS. I am also(well not really)sorry I hurt your so called “man” Taylor. Anyway, I heard your man has a little business to do in Europe so all I ask is that you come back to CT and we can just talk...as friends. I attached a plane ticket and you will most likely come back here with family anyway. Please give me another chance... Love Always, Jason
Tay’s eyes widened and his mouth dropped.
“Bre, I don’t know what to say. Are you going?”
“That’s just it. I don’t know what to do! I mean I know I am going back to CT while your gone because of family.”
“Bre, you know that you can do anything you want. But if you want to end this relationship, please tell me instead of going behind my back,” he choked out.
“Taylor...trust must come into this relationship. And I do not want to end this love we have together....I never in a million years would want to. Since I have to go down there, you have to trust me. I’m not going to see Jason. If that bastard thinks he can win me back with a MEAN letter then he thought wrong.” Tay just smiled. “I love you and I trust you. I can’t let Jason bother you like this. You can’t either. Want to see what I think of this letter?” he asked.
“What?” I asked. He ripped the letter into two.
“Tay thank you. Your the best. Just trust me.”
“Bre calm down, I trust you with all my heart. Your not that type of person.”
“Tay I trust you too. I know you won’t be with any girls in Europe.”
“Bre, I won’t even be attracted to girls in Europe. And trust me, we will be back in plenty of time for your birthday,” he said stroking my cheek, “And we’ll return safe and sound.” I laid my head on his shoulders. “I know...I know.”
“This is going to be fun,” Lynn smiled grabbing his hand. He just looked at her and kissed her softly.
“Thank you...for coming with me.”
After the abortion, things between Lynn and Zac weren’t the same. Whether they would ever be again could only be told with time. For now each of them knew it was time to start all over, and just take it slowly. They knew they could never put the past behind them, but starting over again in their relationship, would help them see what love really was about...and not just sex.
“Lynn, my mom decided to have a party for all of us tonight. So we are going over there, its like a going away party. You can stay the night,” he smiled.
“You know we aren’t going to do anything,” she said looking at the grass, which didn’t seem as green anymore. “Zac I can’t, not after what happened. Taking a child’s life like that was so stupid, and I regret it so much,” she began to cry. Zac grabbed her hands and looked into her eyes. He knew that she wanted to talk. He led her to a hill of grass behind the building where they were alone.
“Lynn, its OK. Everything’s going to be OK.”
“Zac get over it! Don’t you see?! Everything’s not going to be all right’ everything’s different now. We were so stupid! We should have had the baby and then put it up for adoption, the doctor was wrong Zac...I could have had that baby! I didn’t want to say anything until now, but after it was over I did some research and it is possible. She was just probably doing that so things would work out better, my mom probably talked to her ahead of time Zac. OK?! So now do you see what I have to live with? The guilt that I could have saved a persons life...things are so different now,” she mumbled with tears staining her cheeks.
He looked at her with a hurt expression. If he could have watched his son be born he would have jumped for the chance, and now he learns...he could have...she was right...things were so different now. He just took her into his arms.
“What do we do now?” he cried.
“I don’t know, I just don’t know...”she sighed into his shoulder, “I’ve run out of ideas, our lives are just so messed up Zac, they really are.”
“I do know one thing though,” he said looking at her.
“What?” she sniffled.
“We’re together in this. And that when you hurt I feel the same exact pain, and that we’ll get to deal with this together. I’m just glad I have you,” he smiled.
She looked at him and for the first time, realizing he was right. “Yeah, me too,” she cried, “Me too.”
He just held her in his arms under the tree and sat there. Life was really beginning to dislike him.
“Yeah, I guess I am. Um...my mom’s having a going away party at our house tonight. Will you come? And spend the night?” he asked.
“Sure, I would love to,” I said kissing him.
“Good, cause this is it.”
My stomach ached and turned. Tears began to swell in my eyes. I just didn’t want to hear those words. When he’s gone, I would be alone, and I wasn’t used to ‘alone’. I just wished I could turn back time, even though I very well knew I couldn’t. He grabbed me tight.
“I’m going to miss you Tay, I’m going to miss you,” I cried.
“Look at me,” he ordered softly. I looked into his blue eyes which calmed me down a bit.
“I’m going to miss you to,” he said softly.
“No problem, I wanted to,” he said looking in Elizabeth’s direction and then back on the road.
“Hey Lizzy it’s noon, you hungry? Cause we can grab a bite to eat and then head over to my house for the party, we have to be home by 1:00pm.”
“OK, sure,” she said looking out the window.
“You know Liz, I feel really bad for Tay and Bre. I mean this can’t be easy for either of them to be going through.”
“Yeah. You don’t know how much Tay means to Bre. As one of her best friends I know how Bre acts. She likes to hide her feelings. But with Tay she is totally different. She tells him everything and tells him how she feels. Tay’s really special Ike, to be able to bring that said of her out. Lynn and I never could.” Ike just smiled, “She was able to do a lot for him you know. He used to never talk with me or Zac, he used to always separate himself, but with her he seemed to open up, like she has, its kind amazing actually...that two such quite people can get each other to open up so much.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“Zac shut up, listen,” she whispered.
They both began to walk down the hall and then pushed open his room door slightly. They looked at Tay and I crying in each others arms and then looked back into each others eyes.
“Can I, I mean we come in?” Lynn asked.
“Yeah, Tay I wanna talk to Lynn...alone,” I said wiping away my tears. Lynn and I walked into the bedroom we both once shared the first time we got to Tulsa.
“Why?” I asked as I sat on one of the two beds. She sat down near me and put her arms around me, “Because, that’s life. There’s no other way to put it and there isn’t any easy way to go through with this either. You both just have to trust each other more then ever.”
“I know but look,” I said handing her that letter that was sent to me, that was now ripped in half from Tay’s anger.
“Tay already read it,” I murmured as I wiped a few more tears from my eyes. As she read it her face began to look exactly like Tay’s and I got scared.
“Your not going to go are you...I mean this kid is an asshole.”
“No! I would never go. But now I am scared, cause when I do go back he will be looking for me, and now Tay has to trust ME even more.”
“He knows you better then that, and don’t worry about Jason, he has the mental capability of a pigeon, he won’t find you.”
“I know Tay knows me better then that. I just feel do horrible. I haven’t been eating and I haven’t been feeling well. Yesterday I had a fever. Please just don’t tell Tay, or anyone. I know its just because I am so upset. You don’t know how bad this hurts. No one does!” I yelled as I pounded the bed as hard as I could.
“Bre calm down,” Lynn sighed. I continued to hit the bed.
“Bre, damnit stop!!” Lynn yelled.
“No! Why should I? This isn’t right, fair and I hate it! I hate it SOO much! I am so hurt inside, OK! You don’t know how this feels!” I screamed at the top of my lungs. Tay came running in as he heard the screams.
“Tay she’s fine. Please I want to talk to her alone,” Lynn said softly. Tay just stood in horror as he watched me beat the bed and cry.
“Tay? Tay why don’t you go,” Lynn said standing up. Tears fell down his cheeks and he stood limp. He didn’t want to leave the room, he wanted to hug Bre, and be with her. Suddenly Zac came in and grabbed Tay.
“Come on, lets go,” he sighed. The boys left and Lynn sat down near me again.
“Bre I understand. I know I don’t understand completely, but I understand the meaning of pain. I can help. I’m here. Even though I’m leaving I’m here right now. You can talk to me. Emotionally breaking down isn’t going to keep any of us here. I’m sorry I have to say this, but it’s true.” I sat up. “I know but it helps.”
“Good, but try to stop it. It’s not good for you. We all know it’s not. Just remember he will be back. He can’t stay in Europe forever...he won’t stay. Bre, he loves you. Incase you haven’t realized he is going through just as much pain, and he will miss you just as much. You doing this only causes him more pain because in this situation, he is the bad guy.” I just looked at her and shook my head, then gave her a hug.
“I don’t know what I would do if you weren’t my best friend. All the times I have problems you can always help solve them. You are always there. It you weren’t I probably wouldn’t be sitting here right now. I’m not only going to miss Tay...I’m going to miss you too, a lot.”
Lynn smiled. For the past few days she thought her best friend in the world was forgetting about her, never mentioning she would miss her, but finally Bre was opening up.
“I’m gonna miss you too buddy,” she smiled hugging me tight.
“Zac look at her. I feel so horrible and guilty leaving her like this. I am so emotionally upset right now!” he yelled. Zac sat down. “Tay I understand...” he began.
“No you don’t!!” he yelled, “You never will! Lynn’s going, your always gonna be around her. You will stay with her for the next three and a half months!”
“Tay that doesn’t matter. What matters is that I’m here and I want to help. Please, I may not be in the position you are, but I have ears and a mouth.”
“Zac will it all work out?”
“Yeah Tay, it will. I promise it will.” Tay just smiled.
“Your late as always,” Tay moaned walking out to the car, “Responsible drivers aren’t late. I swear Isaac, if you aren’t more careful you will be killed in that car.”
“And you are who? Mom? Oh, OK,” Ike snickered. Tay looked at Ike and stuck his tongue out, while the rest of us piled through the hallway to greet Ike and Liz.
“You know,” I said, “I’m not going to get to see you guys live in like three months, that’s going to suck,” I moaned and laughed. The three boys whispered something amongst themselves and Tay looked back at me.
“Come on down to the basement, all of you. Our instruments are down there. We’ll sign for the three of you. We need some practice anyway,” Tay gushed.
“Sure!” I beamed. We all walked downstairs and they gotten position by their instruments.
“Now what song?” Ike asked.
“How about ‘Weird’?” I asked.
“Sure,” Zac smiled. Zac started with his, ‘wohahu’, part.
“Stop,” Ike said, “Since this is a practice, Zac you have to give it more emotion, and try to sing higher.”
“Oh yeah and Zac maybe you can play the drums a little softer,” Tay sighed, “It is a slower song.”
“Fine,” Zac moaned.
They got through half the song. My hands along with Lynn’s and Elizabeth’s swayed in the air as they sung. We all laughed, knowing we were the only people even in the garage besides the boys, but it was fun and that’s what mattered. Everyone was smiling, everyone but Zac. He just hit the drums hard and sang when he had to. During the second course, where Zac would play the drums alone Tay yelled,
“Give it up for Zac!”
Tears began to stream down his face. He threw down his drum sticks, knocked over the drumset, breaking it in a few places and ran up the stairs. None of us expected his outburst and I sighed, pretty much knowing what was wrong.
“I hate you both!” he yelled from the top of the stairs. I ran quickly after him.
“Zac stop!” I yelled as he ran into his room and slammed his door in my face.
I knocked quietly and then let myself in. I sat down beside him and ran my hand down his back. He just laid there with his head in his pillow to smother his tears.
“Zac, it’s me, what’s wrong?” I asked softly.
“My brothers. I hate them!” he screamed hoping they heard him.
“Zac, why?” I asked.
He sat up, “Just because my voice is changing they are so worried about how we’re going to sound,” tears still streamed from his eyes, “Do this and change that. That’s all they tell me. When Tay’s voice changed Ike just goes, ‘It sounds so good lower Tay’. Now they are so worried I will be heard TOO much, as if they think I sound horrible, which I do and they think that too. And plus in every performance they always say, ‘Give it up for Zac Hanson’ as if no one likes me, they have to remind them I’m there. I mine as well just quit the band.”
My eyes widened and I sighed, I felt so bad for the poor kid. The way his brothers treated him wasn’t right at all.
“No Zac. I think you sound great. I’m not just saying that either, you really have talent, I know it and so do you, deep inside you and I both know you can do it. Quitting is the last thing you should do. I love your voice. In fact Lynn told me it sounds so much sexier now that it’s low,” I laughed, “Talk to your brothers.” There was a knock at the door to interrupt our conversation.
“It’s me Lynn,” she yelled from outside in the hallway.
“Zac think about what I said. I’m sure Lynn will feel the same. Now, can I have a hug?” I asked smiling. He hugged me and I gave him a gentle kiss on the cheek.
“Thanks Bre,” he smiled.
“No problem.”
I opened the door, smiled in Lynn’s direction and left knowing that I was going to kill Taylor and Isaac. When I got downstairs they were trying to fix the drumset while Elizabeth sat watching the floor.
“Taylor! Isaac!” I yelled storming down the stairs, “I am so pissed off at the both of you right now, you have so MAJOR explaining to do!”
“What’s the matter with him?” Ike blankly asked.
“Sit down!” I yelled at the both of them.
“OK, OK, calm down,” Tay sighed.
“Oh give me a break...why should I?!” I yelled at them, “Elizabeth maybe you could sit for a minute and listen, then you can talk to Ike afterwards. Just so you can find out what’s going on.”
“I think I will,” she said giving Ike an evil look.
“What?” he asked looking back at her. She just shook her head.
“Zac wants to quit the band thanks to you to,” I said staring at them madly. Their eyes widened.
“What? Why?” Ike asked timidly.
“Zac said that because his voice is changing all you do is tell him to do this and change that. He thinks you to are afraid people will hear him to much. You two have lowered his self esteem to about a zero and he is SURE he has a bad voice and you two hate it. And he ALSO stated that Ike said quote, ‘Tay’s voice sounds so much better lower’. And that neither of you say anything about his. That’s just cruel. He hasn’t gotten used to his puberty change, and neither of you can support him! What the hell? Your brothers God dammit! Oh yeah, and he said he doesn’t think you guys think he’s famous like you two because all you do is say, ‘Give it up for Zac Hanson!’ As if people could just see straight through him. So now he wants to quit,” I said running off my temper. Both Tay and Ike looked solemnly down at the cold ground.
“Wow...we didn’t think he thought that. We are only trying to help him get used to his new voice. We both think it sounds great, and fits him perfectly. But it can be hard going through puberty, and we just wanted to help him, that’s all,” Tay sighed.
“Did it ever occur to the either of you that you can be TOO pushy? Or maybe you should lay of the ‘help’ a little? Maybe that he is used to HIS new voice? You really hurt him. Guys, I am sorry I am like this, but he means a lot to me, all of you do, and I don’t want to see him hurting like this. It’s not right,” Elizabeth sighed.
“He doesn’t do it to you,” I replied.
“He gives us pointers here and there, and we use them,” Tay said meekly, scared that he might get his head bitten off with more hurtful words.
“Yeah but you two yell these things to him. I mean giving pointers is one thing, but yelling is another,” Elizabeth stated.
“What about the ‘Give it up Zac Hanson’ thing?” I asked.
“Well,” Ike began, “We do it because we think he likes it. We were only trying to be nice.”
“Well, now you know,” Elizabeth sighed.
“I think the three of you need to talk. So come on, lets go to your room where he is and you three will talk...alone,” I suggested demandingly.
“OK,” they both moaned slightly. The four of us knocked on the boys door and walked in.
“I want them out!” Zac yelled.
“No Zac, we need to talk,” Tay sighed. Elizabeth, Lynn and I walked out of the room and left the boys alone to fend for themselves.
“Zac we didn’t know we hurt you like this. We just didn’t know. I admit we were a little demanding, and we were wrong. We’re sorry. But we love your voice, we need you in the band. Hanson is three brothers, Ike, Tay and Zac, not Ike and Tay. We just know it’s hard to have your voice change. Especially both of us since it has already happened to us. But we need you Zac. If you weren’t here, Hanson wouldn’t be here. Your our brother, we’d never want to hurt you,” Tay smiled.
“Really?” Zac asked looking up.
“Yeah,” they both smiled back.
“And we can stop the ‘Zac Hanson’ thing if you don’t like it,” Ike added.
“Yeah, I would really like it,” he smiled.
“So are we brothers again?” Tay asked.
“Yeah,” he laughed. They all just hugged.
“So what do you wanna do now?” Tay said turning off the music, “We’ve been dancing forever.”
“Call me crazy, but do you want to play spin the bottle? I mean it’s just us,” I grinned.
They all looked a little uneasy at first, but then agreed happily. We all sat in a bid circle in the middle of the basement. I placed one of the many empty beer bottles in the middle, we all had drinks that night, so finding one wasn’t that hard. We weren’t suppose to, but sneaking them wasn’t exactly a problem, none of the adults were paying attention.
“So who’s first?” Lynn asked.
“I guess I’ll go,” Liz said wearily.
“OK, go ahead,” I grinned.
She spun the bottle and it went around the circle twice, before it stopped on...Zac. Lynn faces suddenly fogged out as they both stood up. She didn’t know what would happen, if they would really get into the kiss or not, but she trusted them. They kissed each other slightly on the lips, barely touching. Lynn smiled satisfyingly at the kiss. We all laughed because Liz had to bend down a little bit to reach Zac.
“Well, next up,” Liz shook out.
“That would be me,” Tay smiled.
He gave the bottle a hard spin and after three times of going around the circle it landed on...me.
“What luck!!” he yelled.
We both stood in the middle of the circle and smiled at each other happily.
“I love you,” I whispered.
“I love you too.” Our bodies pressed close together and we kissed deeply.
“Go Tay!” Ike yelled as our lips stayed locked. Zac sat laughing while he timed us, three minutes later he spoke.
“OK, OK, enough,” he moaned. He pulled apart and smiled again.
“I could do that forever,” I sighed.
“Me too,” he grinned.
“Anyways, on to bigger and better things,” Lynn boasted, “It’s my turn.”
She slightly spun the bottle hoping it would land on Zac after one spin, unfortunately it landed on, Tay. My mouth dropped, it wasn’t that I didn’t trust the either of them, I was just uncomfortable. I then knew why Lynn looked the way she did when Zac had to kiss Elizabeth, maybe my idea wasn’t so “great”. I couldn’t back out now though, I would just wait until everyone went. It was time to really put that “trust” Tay and I had to work. Lynn stood up giggling and went to kiss Taylor slightly on the lips, but he turned his head on barely kissed her cheek and then sat down as he turned a shade of tomato. I smiled, He really does care, and he really does love me, I thought. If he couldn’t even barely kiss my best friend, how would he kiss anyone else?
It then went to Ike, who spun with caution, keeping his eye on Elizabeth. He was probably to calmest out of all of us, and he didn’t really mind Elizabeth kissing his brothers. But I could see how the neither of them really cared, they had their own world. “Ikey and Lizzy World” were everything was about them. I smiled. I guess we all had our own worlds in one way or another, but theirs was the most distinctive, they were older, more mature and knew what to do in a relationship while the rest of us were just learning. Because of Ike’s caution in spinning the bottle did land on Elizabeth. They both stood up smiling, kissed and then sat back down. It wasn’t a little kiss, but it wasn’t that deep either, it was just right.
Zac spun the bottle quickly, wanting the game to move along. He got the person sitting next to him...me. I got up quietly, playing along with the game. I kissed him gently on the lips and he just looked into my eyes. I figured I had just scared him, he probably didn’t expect me to kiss him like I did, not that it was anything to begin with. I was right and he just sat back down. I was finally my turn and I was excited. Everyone else had gone and I wanted my turn in the spotlight. I was praying that I didn’t get Isaac, because I know Tay would be upset. Me kissing each of his brothers was not the type of game he would have wanted it to end up being. Unfortunately, none of my praying worked...I got Ike. I stood up kissed him gently, as I did Zac and then we both sat down. Taylor was getting much, MUCH to uncomfortable and he was ending this game.
“Hey guys can we...” Tay began.
“Kids come up here!” Diana interrupted.
“Oh well, lets just end it, it was over anyway,” Lynn sighed not really liking the outcome of the game. We all agreed and ran up the stairs.
“We’re leaving,” my parents stated.
“Bye Mom, Dad. I’ll see you tomorrow,” I sighed, “Unfortunately,” I said under my breath.
“Tay, take care honey. We’ll see you soon,” My mom said giving him a hug. Lynn’s parents took her into the corner with tears welling in their eyes.
“Bye Dear,” her mom cried.
“Bye Mom and Dad, I’ll miss you. Trust me I’ll call, I love you both,” she smiled, not crying but not being happy she was leaving them for a even longer period of time either. Elizabeth walked over to Diana.
“Can I please use your phone to say good-bye to my parents?” Elizabeth asked.
“Sure sweetie,” she smiled. Elizabeth walked over to the phone and dialed with a heart full of sadness. It rang twice.
“Hello?” her father answered.
“Hi dad,” she smiled.
As soon as she heard her dad’s voice her heart lifted again. Besides Ike, he was all she lived for.
“Dad I’m gonna miss you so much!” She sighed, “But I want to go, Ike’s a real great guy, really he is. You know I can really see myself with him.”
“Elizabeth, by what your saying I’m sure he is. And I am really glad that your with him, I really am. And if you want to do this honey I am behind you a hundred percent. I love you, and I want the best for you. Everything you want I will help you get,” he gushed.
She smiled inside and out. Her father could always bring the best out of her at bad and sad times, it was just the way he was.
“So dad is mom there? I was just calling to say good-bye so I wanted to say bye to her too,” she sighed.
“I’m so sorry dear, Mom’s at work. You know how it is. She works in New York, she had to go in for a emergency at the office. She won’t be back until about two weeks honey. You can call her then though,” he urged.
She began to cry. That’s all she needed to hear. All her life her mother was never around. She knew “how it was”. Her mother worked in New York and was NEVER home. Her father took care of her, he was a mom and dad all rolled into one. All the things a daughter should learn from a mother, he had to teach her. And no matter how important the family “thing” was, her mother would still choose work over family. Tears streamed down her face unconditionally. All she ever wanted was for her mother to tell her she loved her, or to tell her that she wanted the best for her, or to congratulate her. But no, her mother never did...not once. And now, when she is ready to leave to Europe for three and a half months, her mother could care less, and didn’t even have the decency to say good-bye.
“Elizabeth are you there honey?” her father asked. She stayed quite on the other line, trying to swallow her tears.
“Why dad? Why can’t mom love me like you do? I want a mom, dad. I mean you are a mom and dad all rolled into one, really you are...but I want two parents, and I am just not getting that from mom.” She cried harder and louder.
“Elizabeth sweetheart, I don’t know why mom’s never around. I don’t know why. If I did I would tell you sweetie. But you said good-bye to me, and I told you I love you. And I will be the first person to greet you, with open arms when you return.”
“Dad, I know you will, I’m counting on that. I just want mom to...”
Silence was the rest of the conversation until they said their final good-byes and hung up the phone.
“OK this isn’t going to work!” Tay yelled.
“I know!” I yelled back.
“Here’s the deal,” he stated, “We all want to make out but none of us want the rest of us in the room so...Zac Lynn, go next door to the extra bedroom. Ike and Liz you can go to the basement.”
“OK,” Lynn and Zac said happily.
“WOAH!! NO WAY!! Tay this isn’t fair! Why should Lizzy and I go to the basement?! Why don’t you, you asshole!” Ike yelled.
“Chill Ike, I was just sayin, God. Don’t get so uptight, but we are staying in here!” he yelled back. Diana walked in just in time to keep the boys from really getting mad.
“I assumed y’all wanted privacy to be together. Ike and Liz, you can take Avery and Jessica’s room. They will sleep in our room tonight, if you MUST you can push the beds together. Zac and Lynn can take the spare room while Tay, you and Bre stay in here,” she sighed. I knew she really didn’t want us doing anything.
“Thanks mom,” Tay beamed as he kissed her on the cheek.
She just left with the others and when the door closed Tay just threw off his shirt and we fell to his bed. I began laughing hysterically as he tried to have an intimate encounter.
“Calm down Tay! Gosh, sex is SUPPOSE to be a slow and pleasurable act...I’m not a hooker Tay, don’t worry you don’t gotta pay me for time,” I laughed. He quickly sat up and began laughing hard.
“I know, I know.”
“Tay before this goes any further, I have two things to say.”
“What?” he asked.
“Well first off. I am NOT stupid, you are wearing a condom, so you better go get one,” I smiled.
He just moaned, “Yeah, yeah...what else?” he asked.
I went over to and pulled two notebooks out of my bag.
“What’s that?” he asked as I sat down near him.
“Tay, I began to write this the very first night in this house. The time I met you. Tay every day I would put time aside to write this. Its a book about my life...us. What happens to me everyday is put in this book.”
I wanted so badly to write about Nick and I, about how he was my best friend and helped me out so much, and the other guys too. But I didn't, I wrote about them in a seperate book...that Tay would never see.
“Why didn’t I know?” he asked.
“Tay, there’s a lot of stuff you don’t know about me, and probably never will. I don’t have to tell you EVERYTHING.” I smiled thinking about Nick, “I just wanted it to be a gift from me to you.”
“Thank you. So all of this is what went on with all of us.”
“Tay with one sneeze the rest of my life was planned out and changed. Piece by piece my life came together and day by day this book was written.” I extended the book in my arms to give it to him, “I want you to read this on your trip. Tay my life is finished, it is complete, because you are in it.”
“Wow. Bre...I don’t know what to say but thank you. And I will read it very carefully.”
“Good. Now, lets continue what we were doing before,” I smiled. He just smiled back.
“I love you to.” Zac laid Lynn down on the bed.
“Zac how far will this go? Because I am not making the same mistake twice.” Lynn sat up which forced Zac up as well.
“How far do you want it to go?” he asked.
“Zac, I don’t want to have sex if that’s what your inquiring to do. I’m sorry,” she sighed.
“That’s OK. I know were your coming from, but can we at least hold each other?” he asked.
“Sure. A little hug and kissing couldn’t hurt anybody,” she grinned.
“My ears are open and my eyes are gazin at ya, so what’s up?” he asked.
“Ike, I feel something I have never felt before,” she said softly.
“What?” he asked looking strangely.
“I’m not sure, well actually I am very sure. I just don’t know how to say this. But I guess I’ll be blunt about it. Isaac, I want to loose my virginity to you...tonight,” she said softer. He quickly turned his head and looked at her stunned.
“You...you want to make love? To me?” he asked as his face burnt up a bit.
“No the neighbors dog, of course you! And yes right now. I just love you so much, and I really want to do this. You are the first guy that I have ever had these feelings towards. But you are wearing a condom,” she laughed.
He began to laugh to. “Is that all you can think off?” he bemoaned.
“Well, I am not letting you get me pregnant,” she laughed back.
“OK, I’ll be right back,” he said kissing her softly.
“OK.”
Isaac barged in his room and Taylor quickly jumped off me.
“DAMNIT IKE!” he yelled.
“Nice reflexes buddy! Hey Bre, can you leave for a sec...I needa talk to Tay,” he grinned.
“Sure,” I moaned grabbing my shirt, “You know, next time Ike,” I said standing in the doorway, “Knock!” I yelled slamming the door.
“Ike what the hell do you want? I was just getting ready and we were just getting excited and you had to walk in. Now I lost all my sexual desire,” he moaned. “Now really...what do you want?”
Isaac placed his hand under his bed and grabbed the box of condoms.
“Hey get me one to!” Tay laughed.
“Ha ha,” Ike moaned.
“No really,” Tay said more seriously.
Isaac threw the box at him and Tay put one on the dresser and threw the box back under the bed.
“Nice talkin' to you,” Tay laughed louder. Isaac just walked out and I walked back in.
“What was that all about?” I asked.
“He needed a condom, but obviously he didn’t want anyone but me to know.”
I just laughed, “Go Liz!”
“Now can we continue?” he asked. I just smiled and sat in his lap.
“Tay, is that a pistol in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?” I laughed.
“Ha ha. Your not funny,” he said kissing my shoulder.
I began to run my fingers through his hair and he breathed heavily onto my neck. He threw off my shirt and began to kiss my stomach. I rolled on top of him and began to unbutton his pants and quickly through them off. I began to rub the inside of his legs and he moaned loudly. He put his hand on my chest and rubbed down to my shorts which he had no problem getting off.
“What?” he asked trying to catch his breath.
“I can’t do this. I’m just scared,” she sighed, “Scared that I will get pregnant again.”
“Lynn. I will never let that happen again...never,” he said stroking her cheek.
She just smiled and kissed him gently. Zac stood Lynn up and slowly lifted up her shirt. She lifted her arms to let him take it off. Zac stood looking at Lynn’s bare upper body/ He placed his arms on her shoulders softly.
“Your so beautiful,” he said in amazement.
She just stared at him with loving tears in her eyes. She never heard him say that, and she knew he wasn’t lieing to her.
“Thank you,” she smiled.
Lynn threw off Zac’s shirt and rubbed his body. Zac moved Lynn to the bed and laid her down. He began to kiss her stomach lightly, scared she might still be a little sore. He lowered the strap on her bra and kissed her shoulders. She pushed him down and sat up on him. She rubbed his chest and kissed the front of his neck. He sat up as far as he could and let her sit in his lap. He rubbed her back as they held each other in a tight embrace.
“I love you Zac,” she murmured.
“I love you to.”
He looked at her and their eyes met. They kissed passionately and he took his hands and ran them through her hair.
“Bre that was amazing,” he sighed.
“I know. I’m glad I will have this thought in my mind as the last thing we did together,” I smiled.
“I think we better start cleaning this up a little. Cause’ if my mom comes in...well, she won’t want to see our underwear everywhere,” he laughed.
I grinned, “Yeah.”
Tay got up and found his boxers, slid them on and then gave me mine. He went to put on his shirt and I grabbed all the clothes from his hands.
“Don’t...put that on,” I smiled.
“Oh, OK,” he grinned. I took all the clothes and placed them in a neat pile at the edge of his bed.
“Aren’t you going to put on your clothes?” he asked.
“Do you want me to?”
“Bre...” he choked out.
I grabbed him and pushed him down on the bed.
“Now do you want me to get dressed?” I asked as I rubbed at the edge of his boxers going slightly inside them.
“Bre don’t make me say this,” he said barely being able to do anything but moan.
“Say it, or I’ll stop right now,” I said smiling.
I loved teasing him. He always got this look of pain because he knew what he wanted, but yet he didn’t want to say it, but it also gave him much pleasure.
“I want...” he began.
“Go on,” I said kissing him deeper.
“I want you to...to rub me and get me hard again,” he said just being able to say it without letting out another moan. I just smiled and let out a few laughs.
“Can you please get my underwear to?” she asked.
“Of course,” he smiled.
“God, I am so sore,” she moaned. “I can’t even move. If this is what sex feels like then I am never doing it again!” Isaac laughed handing her, her clothes.
“Don’t say that, that ruins everything,” he grinned.
“You were great though, I really love you,” she smiled.
“I love you to.”
“But you hurt Ike! Ow!” she moaned again throwing a pillow at him.
“Why do you hurt?” he asked turning to her.
“Isaac, virgins don’t have it easy the first time around, well girls anyway. And you pushing so hard sure didn’t help!” she laughed.
“Sorry,” he grinned.
“Oh don’t be sorry. You were great. In fact amazing, I love you. Ikey until this night I didn’t know how strong our love was,” she sighed gazing into his eyes.
“Lizzy, your amazing, beautiful, and just an angel,” he said kissing her softly. She put her head on his chest and closed her eyes as he stroked her hair.
“Yeah,” he said groggily.
“Do you know it’s the next day?” she asked. “It’s midnight.”
“Thanks for telling me Lynn, but I think I could have figured that out on my own.” Lynn leaned over and kissed Zac.
“Don’t be such a grouch. I was just trying to start a conversation.”
“Sorry,” he yawned.
“You should be!” Lynn laughed.
“Excuse me?” he asked.
“You and your ego heard me. You should be,” she laughed harder.
Zac grabbed Lynn and stood up with her in a tight embrace. He turned on the mini stereo and let the music play softly.
“May I have this dance?” he asked taking her hand.
“Yes you may,” she smiled.
He took her in his arms and grabbed her waist. She put her arms around his neck and laid her head on his shoulders. Her warm breath beat on his neck. The moonstruck room seemed like a dream. It was late at night and the rest of the world was sleeping, yet they were together.
“I want to stay like this forever and ever. Never leave your arms and always have you wrapped around me.”
“I want you to always be there for me to kiss and hug and smile at,” he grinned. He took her in his arms tighter.
“You know we’ve been through it all Zac. I want us to be forever. Will you be with me forever?” she asked looking into his eyes.
“Yes. Yes Lynn, I am always going to be the one you turn to when your skies are gray.”
Lynn began to cry.
“What’s wrong?” Zac asked as they kept dancing.
“I love you so much and it makes me so happy that I cry. And I cry because I know if it was up to you we would stand here forever and I know ‘us’ will be forever too.”
Lynn looked at Zac and he wiped away her tears. They kissed in the moonlight.
“I love you so much and you will always be mine,” Zac whispered, “Nothings going to come between that. I love you too much.”
For the first time Lynn heard a few sniffles.
“Zacky are you crying?” she asked.
He looked at her face and the stars made his tears glisten.
“I’m just so in love with you,” he smiled.
“I love you to,” she said laying her head back on his shoulders.
They both just continued to dance in the middle of the room, still hoping and dreaming it would last forever.