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“Damn what do I wear?” she said to herself aloud, “I mine as well wear these clothes while I still can.”
She snickered as she kept looking. Finally she pulled out a small black dress, she looked at it closely. It was black with red flowers embroidered on it. It tied in the neck and then there was no back, it was low cut to the small of her back.
“Well I can’t wear a bra,” she said, “But I like it, so I’m going to wear it.”
She smiled as she slipped it on and then threw on some strappy black shoes. She let her hair down out of her messy bun and brushed it out. She dusted some make-up on and slipped on her glasses.
“There,” she sighed, spraying a few final squirts of her perfume on.
She sat back down on her bed for a minute, she knew she had a few minutes yet.
“This will be fun,” she mused, “I just have to stop thinking and have fun. I have to push all bad thoughts of him and the gynecologist to the back of my head for tonight.”
She stood up and opened her door, praying to herself quietly, swearing she wouldn’t mess this night up. As she slowly walked down the steps she saw Nick standing at the bottom and Brian and Leigh-Anne to the side. She giggled a little as his mouth opened a little as he saw her.
“Wow,” he said softly as he took her hand in his, “You look gorgeous.”
“So do you,” she smiled kissing him softly, “What are you two staring at?” she laughed at Brian and Leigh.
“Nothing, have fun tonight you guys,” Brian smiled winking in their direction.
Kayla blushed a bit as Nick placed her hand in his and they walked out the door.
“So where are we going tonight?” she asked as she looked up at the warm clear Florida night. It was already dark because it was winter, even though it felt like summer.
“You’ll see,” he smiled as he started up his car.
Kayla sat as Nick pulled up his Durango to an over hang of the beach.
“We’re here,” he smiled jumping out of the car and opened her door.
He took her hand and helped her out. She saw him run to the back of the truck and grab a basket and blanket. He took her hand again and they walked to the edge of the over hang, looking down at the calm ocean and beach below them. He spread out the blanket on the grass and they sat down together with the basket behind them.
“Nick this is so beautiful, the view...the company,” she smiled as she sat as close as she could near him.
He just leaned down and kissed her passionately, “I know,” he said wrapping his arms around her, “I figured us being alone would be more romantic. That’s where I was today, trying to find the perfect spot, I wanted this night to be perfect. But it already is, because I have you.”
She just smiled again as he took out the food, “Care to eat?” he grinned.
She just nodded kissing him again.
After they finished eating they had made out for a little while, just enjoying each other in every possible way. Kayla had gotten up to get a blanket for them to lay under and he ran up to chase her. They ran from each other for a little until they both fell down laughing on the blanket. She really was having a good time. He went to go clean up the mess they made with the food, not allowing her to help. Kayla went and sat closer to the edge dangling her feet over. Her mind began to flood with thoughts.
God, what if I shouldn’t be here, what if this isn’t the man I should be with? What if this isn’t the right thing to do? I love him so much though, this is what I want, this is what he wants. And tomorrow, God, I’m so nervous about that, she thought looking down over the edge. Kayla shook her head as she realized exactly how high up they were. But I promised that I wouldn’t think about any of this tonight, I have to stop. I really do, she said standing up to herself. She looked down again and began to get dizzy. She just rubbed her forehead and looked down again, everything got fuzzy.
“What’s going on?” she said so softly he couldn’t hear her.
She closed her eyes and sat for a minute, breathing a little heavier. When she opened them again she blacked out, just for a second. When she got her vision back everything was blurry again, partially because of the tears in her eyes. She stood up quickly and Nick saw her.
“Kayla? Kayla are you OK?” he asked running over to her.
He saw her fall to her knees and stand back up, walking wobbly over to him. He quickly wrapped his arms around her.
“I’m...I’m fine I need to sit down. I...I need to go home,” she said shakily.
“OK, OK baby don’t worry, I’m taking us home right now. It’s late anyways,” he said scared out of his mind.
He helped her in the car and then kissed her forehead. He ran around to the divers seat and began to drive home.
“Baby doll what happened? Your not warm, and you look all right, just scared. What happened?” he asked again.
“I...I, nothing, nothing happened. I just want to be home Nick, I’m fine,” she said trying to cover the fact.
“Baby your not fine,” he retorted.
“YES I am,” she said semi yelling, now getting back to normal.
He didn’t want to fight anymore, he didn’t want to ruin the night, although it pretty much was. He didn’t care at this point though, he loved her too much to care.
“What happened?” Nick asked again as he helped her up to her room.
“N...Nothing, I told you nothing and nothing did. I just, I just wanted to go home, OK?” she said getting a little angry.
“Kayla, please, just tell me your OK?” he said with concern in his eyes.
“I’m fine Nick, now please leave me alone, all right? I want to sleep alone tonight. The date was wonderful and I had a blast, thank you,” she smiled.
“Fine, but the doctor, do you want me to go with you tomorrow?” he asked.
“No, Leigh’s going, I want Leigh to go and JUST Leigh, good night Nick,” she said trying her hardest to make him go.
“Goodnight Kayla, I love you,” he smiled.
“I love you,” she said very faintly.
He went to kiss her, but instead he got the door slammed in his face. When he tried to open it, it was looked. All he could do was let his eyes willingly fill with tears of sorrow.
Kayla fell to her bed, her face covered in tears.
“You couldn’t stop it, could you?” she yelled at herself, “You couldn’t face the fact and put all the thoughts away for the night, you had to ruin it. Now he probably hates you!”
She let out a heavy sigh and cried herself to sleep, still in her dress she wore for the night.
Back to Tulsa: A Love and Hate Story
Part 13