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“It’s OK buddy, we’re all going to get through this. It may take you longer and it may be harder, but you know that you will.”
He just looked at him, pulling away and shaking his head.
“You don’t get it do you? No one understands what I am now going to go through. I don’t have a reason to live anymore...the woman that is now laying dead in that room was my life. I will die a un-loved man, not because I want to, but because I want to. I never will fall in love with another woman besides my daughter, I will never live another minute of my life for my wife. Hell, I won’t ever have a wife. This isn’t fair to me!” he started to scream. His voice was hoarse and although he screamed the words just didn’t want to come out, “Why does God profusely find it fun to antagonize me and put me through hell? You know I have never felt this way, I have never felt my heart break until know. I have always wondered what hell felt like, and right now, this feeling, this is hell in a handbasket,” he cried.
They all watched in silence as Nick fell to a chair and dropped his head in his hands. His body shook compulsively as he cried harder and harder, not being able to breath. Kevin got worried along with AJ and tried to sit him back up.
“Nick man stop this!” AJ yelled to him.
By his voice you could tell he had been crying too, “Man don’t do this. Do you want to die? Is that it?” AJ yelled a little louder, “You promised Kayla something, you promised that you were going to be a parent with her. She’s not here anymore, but are you just going to leave that little girl without any TRUE parents? Are you going to make her go through her WHOLE life feeling unloved? That would be more selfish then anything you have ever done in your entire life. I know Nick Carter as a loving man, a father and a husband whether or not his bride is still on this earth. Just, just don’t do this Nick, please,” AJ begged making his tone a little less demanding.
The whole room looked over at AJ. It didn’t seem as anyone thought of the situation as AJ did, but yet he was the only logical one.
“Man I lived my whole life without a dad, and you know it’s the shittiest experience all right? And then when I find my dad he’s an ass. I just don’t want your daughter to be that way all right? Granted she won’t have a mother, but at least she will have a legacy of an amazing mom. All of us just have to remember Kayla in her best. Dwelling on it is all right at first, but guys we’re never going to get better unless we let Kayla be put to rest. I love her as much as the first, but I also know that this is what she would have wanted. Kayla would have wanted her daughter to be showered in the love she never received,” AJ ended, looking everyone square in the eyes.
Nick’s head was spinning full to the brim with emotion. He wanted to get up and punch AJ for saying such things, telling him to let Kayla go. But then he just wanted to grab AJ and just thank him, thank him for making him see a light that he could live with. He went with the second option, as did the others.
“Thanks AJ,” Nick smiled a little, “I love Kayla with all my heart. I did promise her that, and because I did I will make our daughter live the best life she can. I will never love another woman, I will always love Kayla. I will never be able to date another person as long as I live on this earth, but I have a daughter that I will be with forever.”
Kevin hugged him tight, “You taking care of this baby is more than I could ever ask for. You are not only saving Kayla but you are saving Brian and I. You doing this for part of our family...thank you millions of times,” Kevin said softly.
Brian shook his head in agreement. Nick just nodded, not in the mood to talk much. As the girls all hugged him once Brian walked into Kayla’s room with Kevin, to say their final good-byes. Nick sat outside patiently, trying to figure out where he was to possibly go from there. He had no plans for the future, everything involved a woman that was no longer with him. Suddenly his thoughts were interrupted.
“Excuse me, Mr. Carter?” Dr. Baker asked in a small tone.
“Yes,” Nick said groggily.
“I’m afraid I have some more bad news,” she sighed.
Oh God, not my baby, please not the baby, he begged to himself.
“What is it doctor?” he said very softly, standing near her.
“I’m afraid that I didn’t realize you weren’t the biological father of this baby. You cannot take her with you. Because you never married Kayla and you have no biological relation to this child you may not have her. And since the father is still around, we must first confirm with him that you may have the baby.”
Nick’s eyes glazed over as he fell down onto the chair, then stood up and broke down again.
“But you don’t understand, the father is a monster I tell you! I AM HER FATHER! I love this child, she is all I have left doctor! Please, she won’t be happy with her real father. He will treat her rotten, this isn’t just!” he yelled, “I LOVE HER! She just lost her mother, don’t make her loose the only other man that loves her just as much!” he cried.
“Mr. Carter please calm down. I would like it if you would come to my office. I will have you make a call to Mr...” she looked down at her sheet, “Wilks, Mr. Wilks. If he allows custody to you then you make have her. You won’t be able to bring her home for about a week, or see her for that matter. But that’s only because he has to sign papers stating that he will have nothing to do with her, and such. Then they should process, then she is all yours. Just hope for the best,” she smiled.
Nick looked around for support, someone to lean on...there was no one. Leigh-Anne quietly stood up and saw the begging in Nick’s eyes. She carefully wrapped his body in hers and stroked his hair, trying to calm him down. She couldn’t understand why this was all falling apart as it was. First he lost his love and now his child as well.
“Doctor as far as any of us are concerned Nick is the rightful father to this baby and he will get her. I would like it if he could make the phone call now, get whoever you need to hear the phone call, and let’s go,” Leigh-Anne demanded, “I am sick and tired of waiting here for this slow ass hospital to get things done!”
The doctor looked at her sharply, “Excuse me Ms. Wallace but as far as you are concerned this is an excellent hospital. I will go get the Social Services officer and a few others and then come back and get you Mr. Carter. We will then make a call,” she said walking away.
“Don’t make me do this alone Leigh, come with me to make the call,” he said looking into her eyes.
She just nodded, “Sure.”
When Brian and Kevin walked back out of Kayla’s room they noticed that Nick and Leigh were gone.
“Where did they go?” Brian asked.
Howie slowly stood up and had Brian sit down with him, AJ and Kevin. He explained the situation and Brian stood up enraged.
“DAMNIT!” he yelled punching the wall, “That bastard better not get this baby!”
Nick and Leigh-Anne were sitting in a plain white room with about five other people, including Dr. Baker. They had explained to him that he qualified to be the father, and he would be allowed custody if Aubrey approved. If Aubrey did then he would be sent to sign papers quickly and then they would be sent back to Florida. It would be a week before Nick could officially see his baby or take her home. They would first have to fix the birth certificate and such. But he was told that she would be in perfect care at the hospital until then, now all Nick could do was pray. The phone was put on speaker phone and being taped so the officers would have a copy. He waited shakily near Leigh-Anne as it rang.
“Hello?” Aubrey answered.
“Mr. Aubrey Wilks,” the Social Worker began, “We have some bad news to deliver. Kayla Williams delivered the baby that you helped create today at 11:00am this morning. The baby pulled through fine, but Kayla never made it. Now we have a small problem and I am going to let someone else do the talking now.”
Aubrey sat quietly on the line. He didn’t want to believe what he just heard. Where they going to make him take this child? A lump formed in his throat. He wouldn’t take the baby, he didn’t want the baby, he would definitely give it away if they wanted him to have it. He didn’t care if he did help create it, the baby was a mistake and he didn’t want it in his life.
“Aubrey this is Nick,” Nick sighed shakily.
Oh God, Aubrey said to himself, Shit am I in trouble?
“Yes Nick?” he said calmly.
“Aubrey, Kayla passed on, but her...mine and her’s baby is a beautiful baby girl. She is in perfect health. Aubrey I want to raise this baby, and I am going to be completely honest with you. I don’t like you, and I don’t think you make a good father. The way you treated Kayla, and this baby, you don’t deserve to be any part of it. If it wasn’t for you taking off that damn condom she would still be here, but she and I would have never found each other either. I don’t know if I should thank you or hate you, but I think hate is stronger right now. All I need from you is the consent for me to have custody of this child and you to promise to never step foot in her life unless she asks you to,” Nick said coldly and harshly.
He didn’t know how else to put it to Aubrey, he wasn’t sure how else he could. His whole life he was honest and he wasn’t about to suck up to some bastard. He knew he would win this fight no matter what.
What a dick, that’s all he wanted? I should take the baby and then give it away just to piss him off, but Jesus I don’t even want to see the thing, Aubrey sighed to himself.
“Nick I hate your attitude in fact I don’t like you either. But the fact of the matter is I don't want this kid. I started a knew life, the kid was a mistake. All I wanted was better pleasure and I got it. I don’t care what it led to. You can have the baby and the mother’s body, I don’t want anything. Let me sign whatever I have to just so I don’t have to hear you or your little friends again,” he said tonelessly.
Nick felt like throwing the phone across the room, he wanted to beat Aubrey senseless, for being such a bastard. But he would keep his cool, he wasn’t going to ruin this. He looked at the Social Workers and the doctor and Police officer and their looks were all the same.
“Mr. Wilks, it is apparent that not only do you not want this child but you don’t deserve her either. You will be sent papers to sign by tomorrow afternoon, the sooner you send them back the sooner we won’t have to fine you or put you in jail. The fact is Mr. Wilks, from what we hear you will never see your daughter anyway,” the Police officer said rudely into the phone.
After everything was settled with Aubrey and Nick all he could do was thank everyone profusely. There was still a gut wrenching pain in his stomach and a knife going through his heart. But now with a daughter that he would soon see his life would be able to start a long hard road to recovery. He walked back to the waiting room with Leigh-Anne, tears of sorrow and happiness streaming down his face as he began to tell them all what happened. I did it baby, all for us, he thought softly as a light shown through him faintly.
Back to Tulsa: A Love and Hate Story
Part 20